ecause there are always those in the bushel...

Alluria Savrel
"Holy Priestess of Elune"

Hmm. Good name, despite being an obvious bastardization of 'allure', and good title. I wonder when the slut is going to rear her sultry head.

"Alluria is a stunning graceful woman who seems to glow every time she smiles."

Well that didn't take long, did it?

"Her beautiful glowing eyes seems to pierce into your mind and you can feel a warm, trusting, feeling wash over you every time her eyes meet yours."

Mind control: the ultimate fantasy of every frumpy alternative teenager who won't be getting any until they're old enough to get a job and pay for some on their own.

"The markings on her face resemble red tear drops falling from her eyes."

Ah, the twin emo loves of crying and seeing their own blood, all rolled into one.

"Her flowing robes fit nicely on her."

Of course they do. Robes fit everyone, that's the way they're designed. Monastic orders and the like choose them just for that purpose. But apparently these robes are both flowing and tight at the same time, to show off everything she wants you to see.

"She carries a staff that glows with an eerie unnatural light and some say that contented sighs can sometimes be heard coming from the glowing end."

Even her weapons sigh contentedly in her presence. Of course, it's probably a sex toy she's used to suck the souls out of her ex-boyfriends and the only reason they're still content is because she still uses it as a sex toy.

"She rides a large graceful striped frostsaber which she refers to as "Misha." If you get close enough, Misha will greet you with a friendly growl or a sloppy licking."

It's a big cat, not a freakin' dog! Cats don't typically greet strange people with sloppy licking. Unlike their owners...

Obvious Slut: 10
Obvious Slut: 10
Obvious Slut: 10

Score: "Pay attention to me oh please pay attention to me look at me look at me OH GOD WHY AREN'T YOU LOOKING AT ME!!!"

Diary of a Planeswalker is a fantasy comic created and owned by Anya Talisan and Jacob Matthew,
based in the worlds of Norrath and Azeroth, and copyright their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended.
This site is created, owned, and updated by Anya Talisan.
Please e-mail before using, reproducing, or borrowing any portion of this site.